Finally Free
by Mrs.1DJessup
Summary: What if Karen's death had done differently? More heartfelt and heartbreaking.


The second the bullet pierced through her stomach, something inside her snapped. Like a rubber band having been stretched too far.

Falling to the ground, she realized with shock that she could feel the pain. She could _feel_ again. She was _breathing_ on her own again. She was _thinking_ on her own again.

She was _**free**_ again.

There was an uncomfortable pain in her stomach, which quickly turned into excruciating pain as there was gun fire above her, the Mason's and Maggie against her captors.

When it got quiet, Karen reached her hand to her stomach and felt the bullet wound. Blood quickly coated her hand and she let it drop to the ground.

She glanced over at the Mason's, her heart dropping in overwhelming guilt. Everything she had done to them, to the Second Mass, to _everyone_. She'd killed innocent people, children. Ruined the life's of hundreds.

Then she remembered. She remembered mocking Lourdes that day when she brought Hal food after a mission because she got jealous. She remembered watching Matt ride the rip-stick Hal found for him. She remembered Tom catching her and Hal kissing in that bedroom. She remembered promising Hal that they would find Ben. She remembered getting kidnapped by Pope and meeting Maggie for the first time….. She remembered the day she was taken.

But mostly, she remembered how in love she was with Hal.

Her eyes watered as they found Hal walking a little to her left. Lifting up her blood free hand, she held it out towards him.

"Hal." She called lightly, the loss of blood getting to her. Hal looked over and frowned, making her heart sink even more. "Hal _please_."

Her tone was so desperate, almost heartbreaking to hear for some reason, so Hal slowly walked over. Kneeling down, he slowly took her hand in his.

"I'm sorry."

Hal's eyebrows furrowed and he wasn't sure what to think. "Please, listen to me?"

Giving a slight nod, Hal barley noticed as his dad, Ben and Maggie walk over.

"I'm sorry." She repeated, her voice cracking slightly as she looked at all of them. "I am so, so sorry."

"How are we supposed to know this isn't some trick?" Maggie scoffed.

"It's not." Karen shook her head. "I swear. I know that won't mean much to any of you, but I _swear _to God, I am _sorry._"

Tom looked suspicious. "We don't have any more time Karen, so spit it out."

Nodding, Karen sniffled slightly.

"I know, I know I've done horrible, unforgivable things. And I know you all hate me and could never forgive me. But I am truly, sincerely _sorry_. The day I was taken…I never wanted to hurt anyone…." She almost sobbed. "This sounds like an excuse, but I wasn't myself. They controlled me, made me do those things. And I know I don't have much time left…." She pressed her bloody hand to her wound and winced slightly. "So I just wanted you all to know. I would have killed myself if I could have, to get away. I know that it's better now that I'll die. I would never be forgiven or accepted anywhere again."

Despite everything, Hal felt himself break a little inside. Unknowingly to him, the others did too.

"Please," Karen went on. "Please tell Matt, and Weaver, and Anne and everyone that I'm so, so sorry. And Tom…." She shifted her gaze to him.

"Yes, Karen?" His voice wasn't as hostile anymore, and she swore his eyes were softer.

"Thank you."

Tom looked flabbergasted. "For what?"

"For shooting me." Karen watched as they all looked flabbergasted. "When you shot me, their hold over me broke. You set me free."

Hal's hand shot to her wound suddenly, trying to stop the blood flow. "We can stop the bleeding, we'll get Anne and she can….."

"No." Karen spoke as sternly as she could. "There's nothing left for me Hal. Nothing would be the same, it's better if I die. It's my time."

Hal's eyes watered despite everything and he squeezed her hand.

Karen looked to Maggie. "Take care of him, he loves you so much."

Maggie nodded and looked away, trying to hide the slight pity she felt for the girl.

Karen looked to Tom next. "You were always like a father to me. Please remember that."

Tom nodded slowly. "I will."

Her gaze turned to Ben. "I'm sorry for what I've done to you. I always wanted to meet you after Hal told me about you, and I'm so sorry it happened the way it did."

Ben's hard face softened. "Me too. I'm sorry this happened to you."

Then Karen looked back at Hal. Reaching up, she cupped his face with both of her hands. She was close to going, she could feel it.

"I always loved you, Hal Mason."

A tear escaped Hal's eye. "I loved you too."

Letting go of his face, Karen let her arms drop. Then her own tears leaked out. Hal reached out to wipe away the tears, but she shook her head.

"Don't, I wanna feel them. I can finally feel things again, and I want it like that until the end. I'm finally me again, I'm finally Karen again."

Then to everyone's slight surprise, she smiled. Not the evil, cruel smile they'd grown used to, but her old smile. Her happy, peaceful smile that Hal used to love so much.

There was a puddle of blood surrounding her, her breathes were shorter now, her heart too weak.

Then for the last time, she cried and smiled up at them.

"I'm free now."

And then the light left her eyes, her heart stopped beating.

Maggie set her hand on Hal's shoulder. "Hal…"

Hal gently placed Karen's hands over her chest and gently closed her eyes. Looking up through his tears, he cleared his throat slightly.

"I want to bury her. After everything…..I want to bury her properly. Nicely."

Tom nodded, patting his son's shoulder.

Looking back at Karen's face, he felt slight relief in knowing that she was finally at peace.

"She didn't die as a monster. She died free, finally free."

He smiled a watery smile.

"She died Karen Nadler."


End file.
